From: Charles Daniels <cdaniels@web1.calweb.com>
Subject: Re: Adrics: Sexiest Poster
Date: Wednesday, 10 May 2000 11:15

Chris Cwej <jenis@btinternet.com> wrote:

> Tied in third are Snarky and Innocet! There now follows a short pause
> whilst I leave you to imagine Snarky and Innocet tied up together ;-))

Already have done, often! :)

> Second runner up is the stunning Mags Halliday!

Excellent choice. :)

> (We see the VERY relieved looking faces of those who've not won)

> First runner up is......Nyctolops

Oh wonderful!
Really just a smashing year for sexy people, isn't it?

> "Please note that by opening this envelope you're confirming that
> you're over 18 (21 in some areas) and don't mind viewing material of
> an adult nature"
> (Cwej's face lights up and he tears open the envelope. A "centrefold
> spread" unfurls and Cwej's face lights up even more)

> CHARLES DANIELS!!!!!!!!

<Charles Bum rushes the stage and rips the centerfold out of Chris Cwej's
hands before turning quickly to address the audience in a very somber
tone)

You know the one thing that holds awards ceremonies together.
The glue of the entire institution, is tradition.
That every year we would come here to assemble and pay our respects
to those who have contributed some joy into our own lives, in a very
civil and dignified fashion.

Tradition is so often ignored in these modern times.  One tosses
it aside whenever it becomes inconvenient.

However I have developed a particular tradition with this award.
Every year I try my absolute best, I strive with all my heart,
mind and soul, to shag the brains out of the sexiest poster of the year.
I have dedicated myself to it year after year, the pursuit of carnal
lust and coupling with the person who can porudly claim this award
on their mantlepiece.

Obviously, this year I am in some tricky predicament.
However it is my promise to all that I will not lightly discard
tradition.

Ladies, Gentlemen, my esteemed collegues, please excuse me, as
I'm about to go fuck myself...

Rather typical really... 